Oil Painting Heaven

A poem for artists by Gregg Kreutz

One evening in my studio
while burning midnight oil
a vision came to me
of what’s beyond this mortal coil.

A sudden flash of blinding light
and then a puff of smoke
revealed what will follow
when we paint the final stroke.

Off there in the distance
through an evanescent glow
I saw that there’s a special place
where oil painters go.

A place where painting’s all you do
for twenty-four dash seven,
a place the angels like to call:
Oil Painting Heaven.

In Oil Painting Heaven
all the clouds are filled with easels,
and when you have a one-man show
red dots pop up like measles.

While help is free and teachers teach
and never charge a dime,
advice that’s unsolicited
is treated as a crime.

In Oil Painting Heaven
nearly everyone’s objective,
anatomy’s a piece of cake
and all can do perspective.

And every single portrait
is a symphony of light,
and no one ever tells you
that the mouth is not quite right.

And all the paint you’ll ever need
is sitting on the shelves,
and palettes all are beautiful
and brushes wash themselves.

And when you’re plein air painting
upon some puffy cloud
no matter how bizarre you look
you’ll never draw a crowd.

And best of all is whether
It’s an angel or a saint,
no one drops by to tell you that
their uncle used to paint.

But if some angels do drop by
and say they’re not quite certain
whether what you’re painting now
will go with their new curtain,

Pick up the phone and dial 0
and ask for personnel
‘cause maybe you’ve been transferred
into Oil Painting Hell!

GREGG KREUTZ is a painter, poet, and author whose two books, Problem Solving for Oil Painters and Oil Painting Essentials, are published by Watson-Guptill. For more, visit his daughter Phoebe Kreutz’s YouTube channel (Caveman Caveman).

Realism Today covers artists and products we think you’ll love. Linked products are independently selected and linked to for your convenience. If you buy something using a link on this page, Streamline Publishing may receive a small share of that sale.

Related Poem for Artists > An Art History Poem by Gregg Kreutz